Do you find yourself yelling at your TV during NBA playoff games as you eat your ninth piece of pizza since halftime, but yet never watch basketball before the All-Star Break?
Do you frequently tell your friends that your team should fire your team’s coach — the coach with multiple titles — and trade for LeBron?
Do you accidentally tweet fake Woj accounts, tweet NBA players to make more threes, use the NBA Trade Machine for ridiculous transactions, AND THEN SEND THEM TO YOUR TEAMS OFFICIAL ACCOUNTS AS RECOMMENDATIONS?
Do you play basketball once a year at the Memorial Day Church Picnic and consistently still say “Kobe” as you shoot a fade-a-way airball from the three point line?
If this sounds like you, then wipe the crumbs off the seat, avoid the sticky soda spill on the leather and have a seat on the couch. You’re important and you have a job to do. Your team needs you on that couch… that is, whatever team is YOUR team this month.
The Couch Coach is a podcast made for clowns like you and me.
We think we know what we are talking about when we say CP3, LeBron, KD, Melo, and Boogie should all be on the same team and go undefeated, but then that pesky salary cap gets in the way. (Those collective bargaining agreements, am I right?)
We really have no clue. We’re just fans. Seasoned veterans of a game we mastered mentally in high school, but weren’t physically gifted enough for the next level. Then life happened. We have 2.35 kids, buy a dog with three legs and attempt to pay off our student loans. Suddenly, NBA League Pass just isn’t in our budget.
But when those playoffs come around, bruh… we are ready. Don’t hang around the water cooler at work the day after we watched a game on TNT. We will freely offer all our opinions on how good Steph Curry is and how ridiculous Charles Barkley sounds.
We know enough to make us dangerous.
We know we are average fans.
We are the “couch coaches.”
But it doesn’t have to be this way.
To my fellow hoop-loving Couch Coaches, this is for you.
Welcome to The Couch Coach.